Since the birth of my son almost four years ago, every day has been a Monday.
I extricated myself from the corporate hustle and bustle where the term TGIF really stood for something; in doing so, I also forfeited any excitement when Saturday and Sunday roll around.
Before I started freelancing in earnest over three years ago, each day was the same as the last and I found it boring and disturbing. I wanted more. I didn't know what that meant, but not "contributing" financially was unsettling. And I longed to use my intelligence for something other than figuring out how to make a shrieking baby smile.
Weekends didn't mean much to me because I was "on call" 24/7 (sometimes it felt like 25/7). It was exhausting and I missed enjoying the light at the end of the tunnel. I missed craving the two days of the week when I didn't have to wear pantyhose or be a business woman.
I missed it all.
Fast forward to August 4, 2007.
Today, I have a totally different perspective on "losing" my TGIF attitude.
I still have no weekends. Every day is still a Monday. But I feel much happier about it.
Every day, I wake up with excitement, knowing that I can work... I can write... and I can even get paid for doing so! I can also play with my son, do the laundry, make a pie, eat the pie, hide the remnants, make another pie... every day! It makes me feel so fortunate.
I don't miss my weekends because I have been given a gift: I can enjoy all worlds every day.
I can write for a few hours, head to the pool with my little dude, then come back to the laptop refreshed. I can conduct a telephone interview at 8:00 p.m. EST with someone who is on the west coast and just getting off of work. I can even write in my bed if I want.
Sure, it's demanding. It's tiring. It's disheartening at times. It sometimes makes my head spin. And it's difficult to explain to people who aren't freelancers.
But it's a life that I've chosen rather than one that's been chosen for me.
That's powerful stuff.
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2 comments:
I loved this post. There is great power in writing about your life as a whole, rather than just compartments of it. It allows for a more profound weaving of themes, and new discoveries. This is a wonderful piece, Angelique.
Dear "tiv":
Thanks so much.
It's something I often tell people: "Every day is a Monday." Usually, they look shocked, as if that's a horrible existence to have. But really, it isn't so bad. When I was in the corporate world, I didn't mind Mondays (usually) because I had tons of energy and stuff actually HAPPENED on Mondays. By Friday, clients and colleagues were so out-of-it that nothing ever was accomplished.
Thanks for visiting so frequently; I appreciate it.
Angelique
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