Thursday, January 17, 2008

Medieval blog post

(I'm tired of 21st century living today, so the following irreverent posting is written as though I were a woman living in the middle ages. Sorry to offend. Happy to amuse.)

January 17, 1350

What a surprise. Another burial to go to tomorrow. It's the third one this week. Can't we just email our respects? They're GONE. They don't care. And I'm tired of all the gloom and doom.

Plague, plague, plague. I'm sick to death of it. Can't people talk about anything else these days? I mean, yeah, you lost most of your family who oozed and hacked until they rotted on your family's floor. But, geez, at least you don't have to make dinner for a tribe of 15 anymore! Come on! Look at the bright side!

Seriously, things have gotten really macabre around here. I can't remember the last time we all got together for some rollicking good fun like playing "stone the leper" or "poke fun of the mentally weak." Now THOSE were some good times!

Instead, we're all relegated to sitting around and counting the rats that have accumulated in our homes. Damn little pests -- but they can get kind of cute, too. Just wish they didn't carry those bugs on 'em. Oh, well. They don't do any harm.

Oooops -- gotta go. The porridge is boiling over... what a day!

54 comments:

SzélsőFa said...

email in the 14th century? now that would be weird.
-

But I think you should better stop spoiling the street by urinating and pooing all over it, Ma'm. Also, you gotta really stop throwing out any unwanted food onto the streets. Them nasty rats are getting to like it, though.
Just a handy advice from your general chiropractic, or witch, whatever.

Anonymous said...

Look on the bright side. You can move into your neighbor's house.

Chris Eldin said...

I like you because you're an uninhibited freak.
;-)

Mary Witzl said...

I second what Church Lady has written. This is so true about you, and we ought to start our own club. To my delight, the blogging world is full of us.

And the nice thing about blogging is that we can exchange all these interesting anecdotes without a lot of exposure to bugs and rats.

Nice to know that people no longer poo on the street. Too bad the peeing hasn't stopped, but at least some progress has been made.

The Quoibler said...

Szelsofa:

Ya gotta good point, witchy! :)

=====================
Jason:

Ooo... I like the way you think!

=====================
CL:

I wonder what an inhibited freak would be like?

:)

=====================
Mary:

Maybe we should come up with a blog for us crazies called "Weird Women" or "Giddy Gals"?

:)

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