Monday, March 17, 2008

Five Fortune Cookie Notes You'll Never See

1. "You're going to be hit by a bus tomorrow. No lucky numbers here for you."

2. "The meal you just ate was poisoned. Love, Your Ex"

3. "Why the hell are you reading me? It's your life. What do I care what you do with it?"

4. "You have no future. In fact, even your present looks a little sketchy."

5. "Eat a breath mint, for god's sake! You reek!"

Your turn.

9 comments:

Lori said...

Those are hilarious!

Anonymous said...

10;9;8;7;6;5....

RUN

4;3;2...

TOO LATE; GOOD-BYE

1;...


DONT LOOK BEHIND
TOO LATE

***********

SzélsőFa

Beth said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Beth said...

You could stand to lose about 20 pounds, scratch that, 40!

Ello said...

I like the last one alot. Can we make them and actually hand them out to people who really need them?

Aine said...

Ha! Those are good.

We've found lots of crazy or nonsensical notes in fortune cookies-- this is probably one of those "truth is stranger than fiction" things. In fact, just last weekend Jason pocketed one for use in a future post!

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ChristineEldin said...

LOL! These are very funny!
:-)

The Quoibler said...

Lori:

Glad you enjoyed them! I was trying to be funnier, but no-could-do!

:)

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Szelsofa:

ha ha ha ha ha!

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Beth:

Wouldn't it be fun to see the person reading that?

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Ello:

Well, as someone whose breath reeks upon occasion, I'd fear that the tables would be turned on me!

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Aine:

Cool -- I look forward to the post!

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Webcam:

Can you say "spam"?

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Christine:

Feel free to chime in with some of your own!

Angelique